I have delayed writing this post, not because it was not urgent, but because I have struggled to find the words to convey the horror of the Sagamihara massacre. Less than one month ago, a young man entered the Tsukui Yamayuri En care home for people with disabilities, murdered 19 people and injured 26 others. A cruel irony is that the attack occurred on July 26, a day meant to celebrate the Americans with Disabilities Act in the United States. I have so many things to say about this attack, but I will begin by saying this: Don’t you dare tell me ableism isn’t real. Ableism is real and it is deadly. This attack has been described as a “mercy killing” by some news outlets. Other news outlets failed to even mention it. Call it ruthless. Call it cold-blooded. Call it horrifying. Call it savage. But do not for a moment call it mercy. There is no mercy in slitting people’s throats as they sleep. There is no mercy in annihilating people for simply being who they are. The massacre in Sagamihara must be unequivocally recognized for what it was: a brutal hate crime.
The attitudes that motivated this attack are not new. While this is an extreme example of ableism, when I first learned of the massacre, it was yet another reminder of the ways that the world remains a stunningly hostile place for us disabled folks. I live in a world where Peter Singer, a philosopher who openly advocates for the right to kill a disabled baby after birth, is called not a monster, but one of the most celebrated scholars of our time. I live in a world that often forgets that more than 200,000 Holocaust victims were disabled people, targeted by a Nazi regime that deemed them “useless eaters.” The world I know has more conversations about giving disabled people the tools to die than the tools to live. Voices speak of giving them a “death with dignity,” a conversation we cannot have until every person has the chance at a “life with dignity”— one in which their care is not rationed, they can live where they want, and they do not have to choose between employment and necessary services.
Do you still think ableism isn’t real?
The Sagamihara killer was motivated by the very same ideas behind Adolf Hitler’s euthanasia program. In fact, not long before the massacre, he penned a letter to Japanese Parliament in which he stated that the “disabled can only create misery.” He envisioned a world where disabled people can be euthanized, and in the letter, promised to “wipe out” 470 disabled individuals. Plain and simple, he justified this gut-wrenching disregard for human life with the misguided notion that these particular lives have no value. Sound familiar? In the wake of this horrific tragedy, society is tempted to dismiss this act as a fluke, a shock, an atrocity that “came from nowhere.” Perhaps that feels easier than confronting the fact that it did come from somewhere… centuries of ableist attitudes. Growing up disabled means navigating those attitudes from the very beginning of life.
Coming of age with a disability means a mouthful of orthodontia and shopping for Converse sneakers. But it also means hearing strangers say that they’d “rather die than be in a wheelchair.” It means knowing that you, by virtue of existing, are three times more likely to be the victim of a violent crime. It means knowing that someone could hurt you and yet, escape the justice system if he or she just convinces the jury that taking care of you causes a lot of stress. It means not being surprised by what happened during the early hours of the morning in Sagamihara—just devastated and angry.
The killer was a former employee at the facility. His actions represent the ultimate betrayal of a caregiver’s responsibilities. I have depended on round-the-clock care since birth, and relying on others to literally help me survive has illustrated so many lessons for me. Most importantly, I’ve learned that caregiving relationships at their best are about interdependence and community. But the carnage in Japan is a sobering reminder of the hard truth that they can easily become about power, control, and deciding which bodies, which lives are convenient enough to deserve existence.
Being disabled takes courage. But it’s not the kind of courage with which the world is comfortable. It doesn’t come neatly packaged with “heartwarming” YouTube videos or “touching headlines.” It is quiet, but fierce. It grows and grows inside of you until one day, you join the rebellion that is loving yourself in places and spaces that don’t always love you back.
The Japanese authorities have decided to withhold the names of the victims. The reasons behind this decision are unclear to me, but I worry that in choosing namelessness, the authorities have chosen to reinforce the killer’s beliefs that these people do not matter. I wonder about their favorite songs and favorite foods. I wonder what they dreamed about before they were ripped from their slumber and ripped from a world that needed them. I find myself longing to know their names, to lock eyes with them and tell them they were worthy of life. I wonder, I wonder, and I long to recognize the humanity that their killer could not see.
I do not know their faces, yet I do. Because they look just like me.
Kathleen, Thank you so much for writing this. I have not been able to post anything myself because it is just too much, but your words...I feel them in my heart and spirit. I feel you speak for a lot of us in the disability community - who are devastated, too devastated to give this words. You have given us words. And they have so much power. Thank you. I'm so sorry. I am with you. We are not as alone as we feel. Take care and reach out if you need to.ReplyDelete
Thank you, girl. I am with you. I really struggled to write this, but I'm glad I did. The victims deserve to be honored. I struggle the most with the fact that this is the manifestation of one of my deepest fears, the violation and dishonor of a caregiving relationship. So heartbreaking.Delete
Oh sweetie your words are so powerful. My heart is filled with disbelief that this could happen. The taste in my mouth is bitter and sour. Thank you for your important writing of this barbaric act. Love you.ReplyDelete
I agree, Mrs. Hunt. Horrific and a total assault on human dignity. Thank you for reading. I love youDelete
As a wheelchair user I thank you for writing this poignant piece. It was difficult to read but so important. Thank you.ReplyDelete
thank you for reading.Delete
Thank you for writing this! I'm happy to see someone who agrees that those of us who are disabled should live. I get so angry about the fact that so many people think its "mercy" to kill the sick and disabled that I'm not capable of being as eloquent about it as you are, so it's reassuring to read your blog! I grew up (er - maybe still growing up since I'm 23?) with a chronic illness that became more and more disabling, so whenever people talk about euthanasia like it's good, I'm like "that's like walking up to a stranger and saying 'I hate you, I wish you were dead!'" It's so insulting! So many people think euthanasia is just a matter of political opinion, like picking a strategy in a chess game, and forget that it affects REAL PEOPLE, who have friendships, are loved,love others, and have their own dreams.ReplyDelete
Amazing and moving article. The reason as far as I can tell that the names have not been released is that supposedly in Japan if you have or had a family member with a disability you can lose everything from your job to your home and more. Basically being a known relative to one of these victoms seems like it could destroy everyone in a family forever.ReplyDelete
This is literally one of the most uninformed things I've ever read in my entire life. You ACTUALLY think that One of the most prosperous countries in the world that we live in would ostracize to the point of unemployment, homelessness and "possibly more" (what else could you be referring to? Death?) not only disabled people themselves, but their RELATIVES -- all just because of disabilities???Delete
Answer me this then: why would a facility to care for the disabled even exist?
Seriously, think, PLEASE. Just use your brain sometimes before you say things, that's what it's there for.
He was mentally unstable himself -- why not mention that in your post? You're saying that a mentally disabled person who was in a facility himself leading up to the incident is an ableist? How could the ableism he purportedly acted upon be even taken at face value then?ReplyDelete
State the facts, please. Don't cherry pick to support your narrative, that's dishonest.
I seriously doubt that the killer was "mentally unstable," frankly. He displayed the symptoms of mental illness (but that could have been a deliberate act), and after he wrote the letter to his representative in the parliament, he was admitted to a mental health facility for 12 days of observation. After that, he was released, because the doctors there determined he was not mentally ill. Though I also suspect that his having been in the facility will be used by his lawyers to get him a lighter sentence.Delete
His attack was deliberate, and well-thought out in advance -- his timing and methods chosen in order to be as "successful" as possible, doing the most injury to those he deemed the least worthy of life, and the least injury to those he considered to be on his "Side." And afterward, he calmly drove to the police station and turned himself in.
These are not the acts of a "madman." Please do not dismiss hate as "crazy," just because you disagree with it.
You think a mentally ill person can't be ableist? If it turns out the Orlando shooter was gay, would you think he wasn't homophobic?Delete
The Sagamihara killer probably wasn’t just morally misguided; it seems likely that he also lacked any sense of meaning in his own life. How can anyone expect a person who cannot understand what makes anyone’s life valuable, his own included, to make their living by caring for others? I’m not trying to excuse his actions, just pointing out that it’s a two-way street; caregivers need care too. I don’t believe that anyone with enough presence of mind to be hired in the first place would consider killing, even for what they wrongly perceived as mercy, if they truly understood what it means to have a fulfilling life. Perhaps he felt friendless, unloved, or was just spiteful. Once again, not excusing his actions, but I think it’s worth consideration if it could prevent similar incidents in the future.ReplyDelete
Glad to be reading again after your long hiatus.
Nodding in agreement!Delete
Hey I don't have words to describe this post. I simply want to say that absolutely informative post. It inspires me a lot. Keep posting.ReplyDelete